We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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