like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
