Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
