Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
