We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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