Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
Randomize
