I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Randomize
