I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize