Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
