just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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