Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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