do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
