she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize