"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
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