piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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