God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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