Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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