We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Randomize