I think im going to throw up on grandma
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Dignity is for republicans.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
