how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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