I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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