No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
