Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
