last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
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