So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
