I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
MIDGETS
????
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
