I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
