I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
