So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize