Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
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