How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
