Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
