we have pet lesbian snakes
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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