somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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