i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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