I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
