Having a random hookup so left but love u
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize