i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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