1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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