awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
