What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
