white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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