Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize
