I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize