You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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