i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize