i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize
