even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Just cropdusted the office
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize