i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
