if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
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